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Monday, April 4, 2011

There's No Place Like Home

Remember in the movie "The Wizard of Oz" when Dorothy taps her ruby-red slipper heels together and repeats over and over, "There's no place like home; there's no place like home; there's no place like home"? You know what? She was so right! There truly is no place like home. Your own food bowl on your own rug in your own kitchen.

Your own lady; your own ottoman; your own living room.
Your own pillow; your own couch; your own schedule; everything j u s t l i k e y o u

l i k e i t. No surprises greater than your lady or man arriving home. Even the dog knows home is the place to be!
Well, last Wednesday I received a very unexpected surprise. And my lady wasn't even home to help me deal with it! In the middle of the day who should show up at my house but my nieces from Montana!!!! Here is Carly Jean getting out of her home on wheels (more on this a little later).
And here is Paris and Ella ready to come to my house and partay! Ready or not, here they came.
Now, as you know about me, I REALLY don't like dogs. But these girls are a.o.k. in my book. I mean, unlike our dog, the girls know how to live. Look at this: Paris's favorite spot is actually wrapped around the back of her lady's neck! I remember when I was young, I liked to sit wrapped around my lady's neck. Too dangerous for me now, so I don't do this anymore. But how cool that Paris has such good taste in behavior.
And get a load of this: I love their lady, Sarah, and they don't mind at all if I sit in her lap . . . even WITH THEM! Can you believe how nice they are? The dog always snarls and snaps at me when he's sitting with my lady and I want to join them. Granted the girls run and tear around a little too much, especially in the morning, and they do like to get into my food and water, and they do poop in my yard, and they do all know how to go up and down the stairs, and I can't do that AT ALL (I fell down them when I tried and have never gone there again!), and they do bark a lot over little noises: the men coming home, the dog barking, usual stuff. And they do get to go outside without leashes and I have to wear mine. Oh yeah, and that crazy Carly Jean thinks she can sing.
My lady should get a picture of that! Her man says, "Carly, can you sing?" and she just throws her snoot up in the air and let's 'er fly! "Aaaaooooooooooooooooooo!" Then you know what? The dog starts up, too. It's just humiliating how the dog does these things, especially when company is in the house.
Well, I should have known something bad was coming when the girls showed up. When they come to visit, my lady always ends up going somewhere and leaving me alone with those girls and the dog. But this time it was worse than I could ever have imagined. Here's the first sign that something unpleasant was about to happen:
My lady put a supply of treats in a baggie. Well, that was curious. But the next sure-fire sign that bad things were about to happen:
A supply of food in a baggie. But the next one really confirmed that I was in for a most unpleasant something:
My lady, the girls from Montana and their lady all piled into the truck and left me HOME ALONE WITH THE DOG!!!!!!! But on Saturday morning when my man packed the treats and food in my bed, well, I just lost my composure. Obviously I was getting shipped off to Bernie's for an extended stay. Something about a wedding or something. I don't know. I had to stay at Bernie's all the way until Monday!! When I finally got home, my lady was nowhere to be found. But she showed up a couple of hours later with the girls and their lady and a boatload of luggage and stuff. While it was good to be home, it wasn't long before the girls had to pack up and hit the road. You see, the nieces from Montana are what's known as "over the road" truckers! Can you believe that? Canine truckers! Females at that! Humph! I'd rather stay home.
Here's Paris looking out the driver's side window of her home on wheels.
Carly Jean wishing my lady goodbye. Carly Jean is the chief head over-the-road driver. She spends the most time helping her man drive, while the other two girls spend most of their time tending to their lady.
And this is Ella saying goodbye. Their off to L.A. (lower Alabama) tonight. I'm hoping the storms don't cause them any driving troubles. Check this out: this is their home on the road! Check out that hood ornament! Man, I would love to mark one of those tires!
But, my lady was so good to let me stay home, once I finally got there. After two days of yappy dogs and being cooped up in a kennel, I am soooooo ready to just stay home. Because there's truly no place like home (whether truck or house). Home is best with one's lady and man.


P.S. The girls call my lady their "Grand Lady." She likes that. Come back soon, girls from Montana! We love you! Even though you play with the dog.